Obama: King Of The Stimulus

Last week, researchers unveiled findings about a giant snake from South America. This prehistoric reptile is thought to be the largest terrestrial vertebrate ever discovered. Measuring over 40-foot long, this snake probably ate full-grown alligators for breakfast. To appreciate its size, any snake you’ve seen in the movies could have been inhaled by this oversized reptile. The aptly-named “Titanoboa” perished many years ago in the jungles of Colombia. Unfortunately, a close cousin to this sizable serpent has been slithering through the halls of Congress.

Obama’s Stimulus Set to Pass

The fears of many readers will soon be realized. Obama’s new stimulus package will probably pass Congress this week. This $827 billion piece of legislation passed the House, and most likely will pass the Senate by Tuesday. As various Republican senators march in lockstep with the new President, the bill should reach Obama’s desk by early next week.

Sometimes it’s hard to comprehend numbers in Washington. Just for fun, I clicked on the Windows calculator to grasp the math of Obama’s proposed stimulus (my standard desk calculator couldn’t display all the 0’s). Here’s what I found…

If a drunken sailor was born in the same year as Jesus Christ, and that sailor were to spend $1,000,000 every day of his life – and then his son did the same thing – spent $1 million every day he lived, every day of every year – and generations of drunken sailors lived the same exorbitant lifestyles – by the time the modern sailor reached 2009, that sailor family would still need another 255 years before they wasted $827,000,000,000.

The So-Called Stimulus Package

That’s how much money our new President and Congress wants to spend to stimulate the economy. But is that really what the money will do? Some have said it’s not even possible. They may have a point. According to the Congressional Budget Office, only $26 billion of the “stimulus” will be spent this year. Next year, $110 billion is slated for government expenditures. Huh?

Let me get this straight, we’re saddling our grandchildren with nearly $1 trillion of additional debt to help stimulate the economy, and only 16% of the money will be spent before 2011? Excuse me? I thought this bill was a stimulus for an economy on the brink of another Great Depression? Sounds more like a ruse to expand government over 8 years of Obama rule – with various installments for pet projects.

If you don’t want to call it socialism, fine. Spending money on highways, green energy, and Congressional pork could be construed as business as usual for those inside the Beltway. Maybe a more appropriate title for the stimulus would be a Titanoboa. At least the real snake is dead. But the next one is just being born.